there are times when I still wonder about you. you are someone I have loved, but never known. and you'll never see the reasons I had for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you. I am selfish, I am broken, I am cruel. I am all the things they might have said to you. do you ever think of me and my two hands? and wonder why they never soothed your fevers? and wonder why they never tied your shoes? and wonder why they never held you gently? and wonder why they never had the chance to lose you?